Chiclet Is Coming. But Not Yet.

If I had known how much fun an ultrasound can be, I would have wanted one long before this! Gabe and I had a consultation with the OB who is the new backup doctor for our midwife, and for the first time in any of our pregnancies, we had an ultrasound.

It is always hard for me to picture our babies before they are born, and this time around, I am so busy I don't even have much time to think about the new baby coming along. But wow! When you see a 4D image and recognize family features, it gets pretty exciting! Chiclet is really chubby cheeked already, although only about 5 pounds yet, and definitely not ready to come out and meet us.

The tech who did the scans said she is only supposed to give people 2 photos per ultrasound, but if she likes them, she gives them more. We walked out with about 20! Most of them have the baby's hand in front of the face, but there are a few really good ones.

It is a miracle, Psalm 139 all over again. A heart with four chambers. Two kidneys. Ribs. Hair. Little hands waving five fingers. A person with a destiny...

And here's what we liked really much. We only have to pick one name! We have to be among the worst undecided parents ever when it comes to choosing names. Our first baby was 12 hours old before we settled on his name, and this is three children later. We have pretty much exhausted our store of favorites! It doesn't help that Kenny and Carma used two of them. But at least this time we are not struggling through both the blue and pink sections of the naming books.

So what's your guess? Sammy or Sally?

Gaze of the Soul

"Like the eye which sees everything in front of it and never sees itself, faith is occupied with the Object upon which it rests and pays no attention to itself at all. While we are looking at God, we do not see ourselves--blessed riddance. The man who has struggled to purify himself and has had nothing but repeated failures will experience real relief when he stops tinkering with his soul and looks away to the perfect One. While he looks at Christ, the very things he has so long been trying to do will be getting done within him. It will be God working in him to will and to do."

"The Pursuit of God" by A.W. Tozer

Observations...

...On the life of King Solomon and his many wives.

Alex: "That was kind of a waste of women."

Greg: "He must have lived a long, long time, until he died."

Living Worship

Worship services just aren't what they used to be...B.C. (before children) that is. In the old days, I sat up front where the singing was united and I didn't have to miss any of the sermon because every third person around me had to go potty or needed a drink.

When we had children, we joined the other noisy, needy worshipers in the back third of the benches. Since our church still keeps the Mennonite tradition of separate seating for men and women, my role usually is to care for the smallest child, and Gabe takes the bigger, more trainable ones to sit with him. Recently, though, my ever shrinking lap has given us reason to switch assignments. He is the one with the wiggly 18 month old, and I am flanked on either side by two boys that he has trained to sit still. "Sit still" is relative to a small boy, most times a quite distant relative.

Last Sunday morning I had a serious brain lapse. In order to lure them into eating breakfast quickly, I got out the special treat I had been saving for them... Fruity Pebbles, that amazing mixture of food colorings and sugar. It took me about ten minutes in church to regret ever buying those things, even for 95 cents a box at the bent and dent store. The boy on my left was helpless to control his wiggles. Knowing he has to stay on the bench, his bottom stayed put, but the rest of him did serial squirming and twitching the whole morning. He made valiant efforts, after maternal prompting, to be a quiet mouse for 5 minutes, but it was just too much. I was seriously considering letting him do laps in the parking lot about then.

Meanwhile the other boy got tired of his book and was bored and wanted to write and needed a drink and was bored and hungry and tired. I understood that the message concerned our living hope, and I was blessed by the children's lesson, but when the worship service was over, I didn't feel like I had worshiped very much.

All of this is to explain why I was so inspired by A.W. Tozer's thoughts on worship in "The Pursuit of God". I quote,"We tend to divide our total life into two departments, unconsciously recognizing two sets of actions. The first are performed with a feeling of satisfaction and assurance that they are pleasing to God...prayer, Bible reading, hymn singing, church attendance and other acts of faith. The secular acts include all the ordinary activities, such as eating, sleeping,working, looking after the needs of the body, and performing our dull and prosaic duties here on earth. These we often do reluctantly, apologizing to God for what we consider a waste of time and strength."

He goes on to describe the frustration and lack of peace that comes from this false dilemma in the mind of the Christian. Jesus, while in a human body, did not have a divided life. He said, "I do always the things that please the Father."

Most encouraging to me is the realization that for the born again believer, every act of our ordinary lives can bring glory to God. All of life becomes a sacrament, an external expression of inward grace. Our daily labor can be performed as acts of worship to God in Jesus Christ. This is presenting our bodies, a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God...

I know all this in my head, and it brings an incredibly restful unity in my heart. Let there be no sacred/secular divide! Even in a service that is designed specifically for worship, and I find myself in the middle of child training!

Greg's World

He just has this sort of ... unique... way of looking at life. God knew we as parents need a sense of humor, and to make it easier to laugh, He gave us Greg. Disclaimer: This post will probably bore anyone who is not an aunt or an uncle.

• We were watching Doddy tear down an old, beaten down house with a track hoe. Gregory watched, wide eyed, as the walls and closets were exposed like some giant doll house. He mourned, "They could have saved the wallpaper. It was still nice."

• After a long period of cogitation, he says brightly, "I know why they call them ostriches. Because they have strriiitched out necks."

• One lovely day this week the boys got to ride their bikes along beside me on a walk. After huffing and complaining his way up a slight grade on his teeny bike with training wheels, Gregory was delighted to discover the joy of coasting. He learned how to skid his tires when he braked and with a grin from ear to ear, remarked, "Bikes are kind of like wild horses. They go charging down hills."

• Gabe went on an EMS call tonight for an elderly lady who fell and cut her head. "Poor lady, how do the doctors sew her head on again?"

I am convinced that our children all have different callings in life. Alex is our right hand helper and challenges us and keeps us humble with his questing mind and complex ideas.We get exasperated with Gregory's inability to follow through on the simplest task without getting distracted, but he makes us all laugh. And Olivia's role in the family at this time seems to consist of handing out hugs and kisses and teaching the boys to share graciously.

I am reminded of a statement Val Yoder made when he preached at our church a few weeks ago. "God sees a young couple in love, newly married, and thinks, 'They are going to need some help here. I think I will send them a child to sanctify them and round them out a bit.' And then after a few years, He decides to send them a totally different child and they get some more of their rough edges chipped off, etc. etc." I had never thought about it in quite that way, but I am grateful for each unique little person He has given us, and the lessons He teaches us through our children.

Homespun Fun

There's a shelter for the homeless in our living room today.
It is furnished with stacks of books, and stuffed toys.
They must be literate animal lovers, these squatters.

Meanwhile, in the backyard, they have constructed a curious craft.
This is not a trike, but a boat motor,with seat for the rower behind,
All floating on a section of old wooden railing.

There are days when I ask myself seriously whether it is worth letting them make these colossal messes.We have a grand reckoning every evening before Gabe gets home, cleaning up the rubble in the house so he can get inside the door. Almost daily, I remind the boys that they will need to clean up whatever project they embark upon. It never seems to deter them, so I figure they are getting in their practice as inventors of strange and wonderful things. And I get used to finding my laundry baskets conscripted into cupola duty.

Diligence in Love

I read a book with that title once, and while I thought the book was a little sappy, the message in it was right on target. It simply stressed the need for married couples to be diligent in their loving of one another.

We got married with a firm commitment for a lifetime, and some vague understanding that it might involve some difficulties in the practical aspects of life. Like all newlyweds, we looked around at couples around us who seemed to have fallen out of love, and fervently hoped we would never take each other for granted. After all, love is so effortless.

Of course, we soon figured out that for our marriage to continue to flourish, we would have to learn to love each other well in the day to day practicalities of life. It is not so effortless to be the one who jumps out of bed on Saturday morning to get the phone. Or to forfeit your right to the magazine you were reading when the other one picks it up. Someone has to drink the last of the milk in the jug, and the other might not have any cereal as a result. Silly, little, nitty- gritty things, all, but the stuff that life is made of.

Being of a rather practical nature, here are some things that Gabriel did recently that assure me he loves me just as much as when he brings me a bouquet of roses.

• He brought me half of his doughnut from the brother's meeting coffee break.
• He fixes the bed on Sunday mornings and dresses the children while I put our lunch into the oven.
• He says, "Just what I was hungry for," when there is soup for supper.
• He calls me "Hon", not "Mama".
• He quietly goes and irons the shirt that isn't in the closet when he needs it.
• He got a beautiful pink planner for me to help me in my goal to be more organized this year.
• He understands my need for dark chocolate.
• He went shopping on Black Friday and bought a lovely sheet set.
• He took care of the children so I could go to Goodwill by myself.
• He prays with me about the everyday things that challenge me.
• He never says, "I just can't understand women." Even when he can't.
  

Little ordinary things, all, but the stuff that life is made of. These are the little courtesies that make it such a joy to live together. Valentine's Day is a wonderful celebration, and I can't wait for our date tonight. Not just because of the candlelight and frilly hearts, but because of the foundation my sweetheart has laid of loving me diligently.